One of the first work-related challenges you may face is the decision about whether to share your cancer diagnosis with your employer. Deciding whether to disclose at work is intensely personal, if you choose to do so it’s important to determine ahead of time how much detail you want to reveal.
Then it’s best to prepare yourself for some of the comments and questions that you might encounter at work. Practice what you plan to say to ensure that you don’t unexpectedly divulge more than what you are comfortable with during a conversation at work. Anticipating how people will react or respond to your diagnosis is hard, and regardless of their reaction, it may not be the right one for you in that moment. Making a list of potential responses might make it easier to deal with whatever comes your way. There is a whole spectrum to consider – fear, discomfort, anxiety, pity, sympathy, love, support, etc. Situations like this can bring out the best (and sometimes worst) in people. Hopefully, if you do tell, it will provide relief and could even yield a tremendous amount of support. It’s just helpful to prepare yourself as much as possible for all types of reactions, comments and questions.
By sharing your cancer diagnosis, you may be seen as “The Person with Cancer” at your workplace for a period of time. It might take time to recast yourself in the eyes of your workplace, but try not to get too frustrated or take it personally if a co-worker or boss makes an awkward or insensitive comment. If you find that your co-workers are dwelling on your diagnosis instead of work-related topics, try a technique we refer to as “the swivel.” For example, you can take even the most well-intentioned question like “How are you feeling today?” and swivel away from the cancer topic and back to work. For instance, “I’m fine, thanks. While I have you, do you have time this week to go over the new expense reports?” The key is to acknowledge your colleague’s comment and then swivel the conversation to a place where you feel comfortable and empowered. By focusing on work, you will help your co-workers see you how you want to be seen.
This blog was contributed by Cancer and Careers, an organization dedicated to empowering and educating people with cancer to thrive in their workplace, by providing expert advice, interactive tools and educational events. Visit their website to learn more.